Monday, August 1, 2011
Recognize Times to Keep Your Mouth Shut
While in the Authors' Booth at the State Fair, a visitor asked me, "What is the most important thing you have learned about making relationship work?" Tough question. I think my answer was, "Prioritize the relationship."
The question lingered in my mind. Maybe the most important thing I continue to learn is when to keep my mouth shut. Some people would say, pick your battles, but I have found many battles can be avoided by keeping my mouth shut.
"You didn't turn off the lights, air conditioner, water; close the door, drawer, curtain; why do you have to drip across the floor; slow down; you eat too fast; you spend too much money." These are the kinds of things that waste your energy and irritate your mate. Give it up. If there is a serious problem, it won't be resolved this way.
Your mate may not notice when you stop complaining. He or she will feel the difference but may not know why he or she is feeling warmer and closer to you.
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I have done a pretty fair job of keeping my mouth shut since I wrote this post. Everett hasn't noticed. Last night he brought it up after a disagreement over a play in the 49ers game. Basically, he said that I talk too much. Do you think it could be because I am an extrovert and he is an introvert?
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